what the actual fuck i think this has been the perfect time to ever write something, especially as a teenager because damn i am not feeling myself these days and i am not liking the person to whom i am evolving too, too much excessive eating, too much time on social media oh and my new phone i think that my new is phone is the root of all my miseries. it is true. all of the essays i have written till date have been leading me up to this. yes. and to study ughhh i just cannot i do not know why. i have four days left and i will be back and writing about all of them but i hope i do not survive. i do not know what i am writing at this point, to probably cringe at this stuff later and puke but it is okay just remember the feeling of warmth and love in his arms:))
this year was the worst year of my life. but hey i have still got 17 days left but i do not intend to make it better. let it be. i hate my friends so much. and i miss daksh so much. i hate my friends but act all giddy around them and love daksh but pretend to be stern with him. bu they daksh hurt me. even though he has his own family issues he should not impose that on other people. my heart goes out to him i empathise with him and i yearn for him. yearn for our talks. no matter how much he gaslighted me i enjoyed it. but i hope he never makes contact ever again. and i should turn into a lesbian or asexual. idk. because men ew no. i hate how my dad treats my mom. i cannot bear someone treating me like that. my mom should leave him. even though he was caught in infidelity, he has not changed. i still remember that morning where my mum was crying and all family was there except my sister. oh gosh. but worse stuff happen to women outside too. but good stuff too. my only goal in life will ...
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