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Showing posts from February, 2023
why cant we women just like live without boys. why do we have to spend late nights obsessively talking about them while they probably don't even give a damn about you and are probably talking to an another girl. it's always us who are the victims right? and it is so so sad. can't we just talk about ourselves and how amazing we are. i don't think we need boys to live, we can be happy and contended within ourselves to right? we have beautiful minds but all we want to do is open instagram and obsess over that silly lil boy, who's probably calling you a whore. but you dont give a damn right all you care about is how good he looks. utter bullshit. that's why i think i relate to jo march so much. and right now i am crying for that reason and for the first time i compulsively with my whole heart hate hate hate men. don't get me wrong over here i am not hating over men here, well i am but more that that i am more angry at ourselves, us pretty girls who have let thes
so in love with people who are just. unapologetically themselves. they don't give a damn what you think about the pastel plushies decorating their bed, nor what you think about the pins of their favorite cartoon characters on their backpack. they will continue writing their fanfictions regardless of whether you think it's cool or not; will continue reading their comfort books in spite of any stringent critics; will continue watching and rewatching their so called cheesy romcoms because they enjoy doing so. they will continue prioritizing their happiness over pleasing people who will never be pleased and quieting white noise that will never be quieted. 
self care is watching little women 2019 and relating so hard to jo because she thought platonic love was all she needed to be happy but then watched everyone she loves prioritize romantic love before her and realizing how lonely she was without romance despite how much she detested wanting it
i keep trying to memorize every detail of the moments i live in. in the soreness of my legs from standing so long at a concert, the chill of the night, the patterns of a tablecloth, the oily texture in my mouth after eating junk. i keep trying to memorize the feelings, the quiet contentedness, the laughter, the excitement, i keep trying to memorize the people, their smiles, the way they speak, what makes them laugh. i am constantly on the cusp of the next part of my life and that's just so.. strange. but it makes it so much easier to find happiness no matter what's happening to me, in a way? because i am already kinda looking at life with those rose-colored glasses of nostalgia, simply because i know these are time i'll never be able to live again, and these are people i might not always have, and that makes it so much easier to appreciate everything i might miss later. 
nothing i have read has changed me more than "you do people a favor by accepting their help" like i repeat this constantly to so many people because it's true!!! people like to feel useful, the like to feel kind, they like to feel that they have an ability to impact everyone's lives so just let them!! not everything is a thing to be owed back, accept people's kindness without making a competition out of it. 

twelfth february '23

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keep this in mind. you're still young. attention is always warranted. but the greatest thing you can be right now, at this age, is untouchable. the girl people are scared to approach, the one who commands respect just by being. the girl who worked really hard and is super smart and has the brightest of futures ahead. don't be eager for attention. don't accept attention from just anybody. do your own thing. hustle. be loud and heard and yourself and vibrant. but don't do it for a guy, and certainly don't ever let a guy disrespect you. 
i am a serene and lovely person. yes absolutely everyone and everything bothers me i go through life in a constant state of aggravation and annoyance and have to physically restrain myself from breaking down in tears over how utterly irritated i am. but i am serene and lovely nevertheless
 i am starting to think that i might actually have adhd
  i always wanted an adventurous life. i have to confess that, deep down, i harbor a certain sort of scorn for people that are content in their ordinary, amazingly run-of-the-mill existences as housewives and chartered accountants and whatnot. i want to grab them by the necks and scream, 'how can you LIVE like this?? don't you want to go out into the world, explore, learn, seek out fame and fortune? ' because i do. - cherish whose blog is ethereal.blogspot.com  gosh she just put me in beautiful english words, aiming to write like her!!  
the main reason i have started this blog is to share my pretty world with people all around the world who will appreciate me.  disclaimer: my blog is a personal thing which is open to everybody except the people in know in real life because i love being delusional