safe space

i refuse to be a person who wishes so badly for change and then lacks the actions to prove that desire. even though i'm feeling so overwhelmed with the amount of changes occurring and the amount of things i have to do in such a short span of time i will not sacrifice anything i consider a priority. i will adapt to the situations and give my 100% to each and every challenge because back is where the opportunity for growth lies, and as my bestie charles darwin once said "it is not the strongest of the species that survives nor the most intelligent it is the one that is most adaptable to change." 

aahhh just writing because this feeling is so rare especially nowadays but i wanna be a trophy wife and a high society lady. swarming with elegance and beauty and precision. powerful and sustaining it with my grace. ahhh. 

hey! so im currently listening to ophelia by taylor swift. it is so good. the album is such a bop. it is truly true that you never like the album on the first listen lest understand its essence.  and i have come to a conclusion. that i will always be like this. unsure, unnoticed, sad, depressed melancholic (there is beauty in that too!), belittled, always a follower and never a leader(but hey, i do not mind that too!). my friends compliment me but it hurts. strange how i always craved it but now even though it secretly validates me but then i think that is only the people-pleasing side of me.  like i have lost the ability to cry, my favourite thing to do!!! its like no matter how depressing the situation is i am of the opinion that is forebode and i am destined for them. i think i am turning into my grandpa as well. ugh i hate writing bad stuff about people. but they truly do not mean anything to me even though they must love me so much. idk if that is true. it must be. if i a...

the hopeless romantic in me will always love that boy from sixth grade